A Car and an Iceberg Away.
By the age of 6 I had already decided what I wanted to be when I grew up. I was gonna live on an iceberg. In a rusty old Volvo. And there I would sit, eating raw fish with my hands. If that for some reason didn’t happen I was going to be a singer with 12 kids.
I guess things don’t always pan out. I don’t own a car and I dislike children, so obviously I have to look into some other options. I’m in school now working on my third degree and this time it’s going to be different. It’s almost like having a new boyfriend. My nursing-degree boyfriend was nice for a while, but turned out to be kind of abusive. My literature-degree boyfriend sucked the joy out of reading, and frankly didn’t bring in the big bucks. So I’m hoping my veterinary medicine boyfriend will make me feel better about myself. I swear he’s not like the others! Continue reading »
Filed under Lost Demographic | Comment (0)Even Robots Get the Blues.
You really do have to be a machine in order to make any significant headway as a self-made man or woman, or at least this is what I’m assuming since ’self-made’ doesn’t quite apply to me yet. As a culture, we have an undying fascination with the whole rags to riches story, but what gets someone from the rags to the riches exactly? There is this romantic notion of chasing down the American Dream, but as we all know, with romance comes the ever encroaching risk of heartbreak.
No one seems to linger on this point though, perhaps because the people that ‘make it’ are only interesting enough to interview post-success. And so, looking down from the top, it’s probably easy for them to adopt a sentimental view of the struggle. I, however, am in the thick of it, and the uphill climb is a sonofabitch. Sentimental feelings are a long way off for this little bird. That said, the relationship is not without romance. Waking up at a reasonable hour, strolling in to my very own studio, enjoying the backdrop of good music and old movies while I work, these are the small payoffs that I treasure. Continue reading »
Filed under Blackbird Diary | Comment (0)Forget enthusiasm. Just be polite and professional.
So, it’s finally the weekend, your coveted two day stretch between the 5 laborious and exhausting days you spend at work. So what are you going to do? How about call up someone you barely know and, in a roundabout way, ask them for a HUGE favor! YEEAAAH! This ghastly practice is called networking. And while this isn’t the only way to do it, it’s one of the few ways to get in touch with a specific someone you feel could help your situation. So, you suck it up, pace the room, and give them a ring. I had to do this a couple of Saturdays ago, and while this woman (we’ll call her Miss Sprouts) is extremely nice, you may still feel like a filthy beggar soliciting a well-dressed pedestrian on the street. I called Miss Sprouts because I heard she was good friends with the woman who owned an agency I was interested in working for. To make a long story short, I was able to get my resume forwarded to the agency, allotted no face-time, and was ultimately rejected. So while my efforts may seem fruitless, I was able to walk away with one lovely sentiment:
While on the phone with Miss Sprouts, I went off on a tirade exclaiming how I had to get out of my current job lickety split or I was probably going to get booted out on my rump. “I just can’t fake the enthusiasm anymore!,” I said. And that’s when she eloquently replied, “honey, forget enthusiasm. Just be polite and professional. Continue reading »
Filed under Lost Demographic | Comment (0)A Pat on the Back and a Punch to the Face.
So, the whole marketing thing is new, and somewhat uncomfortable territory for Blackbird Tees. That said, once the novelty of launching a business wears off with friends and family, I am actually going to need customers. And so, today I dipped my feet into the frigid water of self-promotion to see what happens. Will I lose a toe, drop a toaster in and end my misery, suffer lasting hypothermia? Well, the jury is still out.
After creating an account on craigslist, I submitted a post to the job market forum, describing my business and how I screenprint people’s resumes onto their shirts. Well, within seconds, a stranger responded with some words of encouragement, “fabulous, innovative idea.” Great, I’m feeling good, embraced by the community at large…at one with my people. Not even thirty seconds later, another user, who identifies him/herself only by the alias ‘fartedatwork3′ replies to that post by writing “for tards like you, maybe.” And that’s all she wrote, folks. So ends today’s plunge into the Arctic cold, and I’m walking away feeling like I’ve taken a hit. A little like our friend the dog. Continue reading »
Filed under Blackbird Diary | Comments (3)The Trust Your Blackbird Series
Here at Blackbird, we don’t think anything exists in isolation. The seemingly small decisions you make in one area of your life can have an enormous impact on how you move through the world. Often times, the most significant shifts come when you put yourself out there and let the chips fall where they may. Sometimes it works out beautifully and sometimes you have find satisfaction in the attempt. Either way, these are moments worth sharing. In the Trust Your Blackbird Series, we will be featuring interviews and submissions from small business owners and everyday people about their struggle to transform an idea from dream into reality. Taken together, these stories will remind us each of the possibilities that exist. Our hope is that you will see yourself in their respective stories, and thus be able to envision a wider spectrum of choices available to you. Far too many of us sell ourselves short when it comes to career, and Trust Your Blackbird will be working tirelessly to counteract that tendency.
Filed under Trust Your Blackbird | Comment (0)Fine, I’ll Just Take My Negative Net Worth Elsewhere.
This past October, I broke up with my bank. After walking a mile and a half in the rain, I entered the lobby, made my way to the seating area, and waited patiently to speak with someone in charge. I opened my notebook to review the list of complaints I had compiled the night before. It looked a little like this:
1. In the two months I have had a business checking account with you, I have been able to access my online information only twice. Your IT people have kept me on the phone for 3 hours trying to resolve the issue, but in the end, said it was simply because I have a Mac.
2. The Administrator of your small business office had me fill out a credit card application and provide personal tax returns only to lose them. I called her twice to follow up, and she did not return my call either time.
3. When I came down in person to find out what had happened to my paperwork, I was passed off to three different employees, one of which was a total douchebag named Toby that talked to me about business plans like I was still in diapers.
4. You and your team completely suck. Continue reading »
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